Happy Holidays, everyone!  No, that’s not an opening salvo in the ‘war on Christmas’ (Puh-leeze. What war on Christmas? I’ve heard ‘Carol of the Bells’ three times already today and it’s not even noon). No, when I say ‘Happy Holidays’ I mean holidays of the culinary kind and between now and the end of the year, we have lots of celebratory days to cover.

Since everyone is crunched for time this time of year, I thought I’d cover a few holidays all in one go and slightly early so you can pencil this foodie festivities in at your convenience.

National Ambrosia Day (December 12): Ah, ambrosia, food of the gods. I somehow suspect however that this is not what they meant the day to celebrate. I have to believe it is a day devoted to ambrosia the fruit salad. Not as lofty sounding perhaps but certainly more accessible. Now as a matter of personal preference, I tend to stay away from salads that contain marshmallows but that put me firmly in the minority growing up (it’s a very Southern thing, you see). Still, you must make up your own mind about it.

Ambrosia Salad

• 2 cans pineapple chunks
• 2 cans mandarin oranges
• 2 jars maraschino cherries
• 1 can coconut flakes
• 1/2 bag mini marshmallows
• 4 oz. sour cream
• 16 oz. Cool Whip – and honestly, it really MUST be Cool Whip if you want to ensure the Southern integrity of the thing. (And no ‘Southern integrity’ is not an oxymoron. Keep that up and there will be no honey dipped fried chicken or jambalaya for your later on)

Drain the fruit and set aside.  Combine sour cream and Cool Whip. Fold in all other ingredients. Chill covered for at least 2 hours. If you want to try a lighter – slightly less traditional version (and one I admit to prefering, try this one.)

National Cocoa Day (December 13: Ha! I celebrated this days ago. So ahead of the curve here.

National Bouillabaisse Day (December 14): What can I say about this notable day that I didn’t say last year? Not much. Last year, I was pretty thorough on the topic.

National Lemon Cupcake Day (December 15): Not sure why one would settle for just a cupcake when one could make a whole lemon cake but I suppose if one if going over the river and through the woods to Grandmother’s house, cupcakes are easier to hand round.

National Chocolate Covered Anything Day (December 16): I am all for chocolate, don’t get me wrong. But you can’t just go throwing chocolate on things willy-nilly. Why diminish or demean chocolate covered raisins by lumping them in with chocolate covered – oh, I don’t know – frogs’ legs. Why further alienate the people who love chocolate covered pretzels by making it just one of many things and not letting have the chance to shine on it’s own (I’ve only recently come around to chocolate covered pretzels myself and I feel certain that given time and a bit more attention, they’d catch on with more people. So yes – celebrate the covering of food stuffs in chocolate. But in slightly a slightly more focused way. By the way, my favorite item in this field is the frozen chocolate covered banana. Long ago, you see – I worked at the Renaissance Festival and . . .  Um, you know. That’s another story for another time.

National French Fried Shrimp Day (December 21): See, now this is what I meant about being focused. You don’t see ‘National French Fried ANYTHING Day’, do you? No. This is about shrimp. And on another day, it will be about plantains (fried plantains, by the way – worth celebrating).

National Pfeffernuesse Day (December 23): I confess I had to look this up. But now that I have looked them up and know what they are, I really want to try them.

National Egg Nog Day (December 24): I am fine with celebrating egg nog provided we are celebrating proper booze-infused eggnog and not some twee sugary version

National Pumpkin Pie Day (December 25): Was it not enough that this is also Christmas? Is Christmas not enough? Who on earth has the celebratory bandwidth to also embrace and extohl pumpkin pie at this point? Even if they felt passionately enough about pumpkin pie to do so, sure;y it would have been done back at Thanksgiving. Well, OK – that’s very American-centric of me. Sorry. But still – if pumpkin pies are worth celebrating, why give them a day when they are bound to be overshadowed?

National Candy Cane Day (December 26): Sounds like an excuse someone came up with to use up all the left over candy canes. Personally, I only keep one or two on hand anyway. And those are used only to stir the cocoa

National Fruitcake Day (December 27): What exactly is being celebrated here? The fruitcake itself or the fact that the person you gave it to didn’t heft it across the table aiming for your head when you presented it to them? Or perhaps we are celebrating that the person we gave it to doesn’t realize it’s been re-gifted (because if any foodstff can be re-gifted, it’s a fruitcake). But perhaps I am being harsh. Perhaps fruit cake has gotten a bad rap. What do you think? Is there anyone out there willing to defend this much mocked holiday “treat?”

National Bicarbonate of Soda Day (December 30): I feel strongly that this should actually be moved to January 1.